America's Fear Culture

There are few things more terrifying than getting only one highlight of a news report without getting the details. This happened to me with the recent shooting at Purdue. I saw the Facebook photos of candlelight vigils, people changing their profile pictures to the black ribbon with the P, and statuses expressing that thoughts and prayers were with the Purdue community. I saw links with headlines to the story about the shooting. I saw these things on the worst smartphone ever made, the Nokia Asha 201; these things were all I knew for days. I was upset – I have many friends that are still at Purdue, and I knew nothing about their well-being.

If it weren’t for my parents and Kelli, I would be so clueless about the happenings in America. They keep me current, and they explained what really happened. This made me think about my concern and its origin. It should not be the norm in America to read about a shooting and wonder how high the death toll is, but school shootings are commonplace enough that that is what I wondered first. School shootings are commonplace. Children are killed in heartbreaking numbers by people with guns that have invaded what is supposed to be a safe place. If I were a parent, I have no idea how I would ever let my child leave the house; these thoughts are scary.

Before I left for my service in Swaziland, people expressed a lot of concern for my safety. We, as Americans, know that people were hacked to pieces with machetes in Rwanda in the mid-1990s. We know about the genocide in the DRC. We know that there is a civil war in South Sudan. We know that Egypt is a center of unrest. And we, as Americans, are so used to violence and death in our media and lives that, combined with what we know about African countries, assume the whole continent is dangerous.

It makes me sad to reflect on this. Yes, people get murdered in Swaziland. It happens, generally during elections because body parts bring the candidates muti (black magic, good luck). It is, however, quite rare. I have seen few people with guns, and the ones I have seen were the guards on money transport duty for the banks. I have not seen guns on soldiers or police. I have not seen guns on civilians. When I worked at Wee Willie’s in the lovely town of Ellettsville, I had customers walk in with guns on their hips. I saw more armed people in my job as a small-town waitress than I do in Africa. Let that sink in.

Yes, I get harassed. Sometimes I get grabbed. Despite all that, I have never felt that my safety was at risk. I have never been afraid of losing my life. For the past 7 months, I have not lived in fear from people (snakes, spiders, and scorpions yes, but not people). It took being freed of the fear of death to understand how afraid I was back home.

When I was out walking on my university campus after dark, I had to have someone on the phone. I would call my parents or a friend and chat. Sometimes I’d declare my location quite loudly so would-be attackers knew people were looking out for me. Sometimes I’d call Kelli and plead with her to pick me up (this was possibly due to laziness as much as fear, but whatever). I was not comfortable after dark on my own campus, which is where I lived for 4 years. I’m rarely out after dark now, but even in crowded and noisy Manzini I’m not that afraid. In America, I would have been afraid of someone grabbing me and pulling me into a car. Is that crazy? I don’t think so; Bloomington alone has far too many missing young women, and Indianapolis has more. In Manzini, as with most of Swaziland, being pickpocketed is my biggest concern.

It’s a bizarre thought that I had to come to Africa to feel safe. America’s fear culture is probably also played up by the media – drama sells. In Swaziland, I have seen a lot of headlines like “Vampire released from jail after posting bail” and “Umlungu gets tekaed” (white person is subjected to a traditional marriage). Headlines about corruption and affairs are common, but the Kaizer Chiefs dominate the papers. Headlines about the crashing economy, high rates of murder, rape culture, student loan debt, America losing its place on top, rapes happening in towns we’ve never heard of, and other grim and upsetting headlines do not make a big show here. The media does not promulgate a culture of fear, and Swazis go about their daily lives feeling happy and safe.

The common thing I hear from Swazis about Swaziland is that it is so peaceful. Swaziland has never had a civil war. It regained its land through negotiations and treaties following its independence, not through armies and guns. Swazis take issues to the village council, and the council works it out. Arrests, trials, probation, jail, huge fees, and other drama of the US legal system are left out. You know what? It works. The crime rate here is very low.

I tried to explain school shootings to my host family. This was one of the hardest discussions to have with them. They just didn’t understand. I kept repeating: students or outsiders bring a gun to school and shoot children; they are shooting to kill. They didn’t believe me at first. They thought I was making up stories. When I told them about Newtown, they were shocked and upset. Once the reality of what I was saying sunk in, they were sad. My babe (father) shook his head and said, “I never would have known America was such a place. I could never live there. I value peace too much.”

I love my country. I am American. I wouldn’t change that for the world. That being said, no place is perfect. I have grown to appreciate America more since leaving it, but I have also been able to see how destructive this violence and fear culture are. I feel safe, so I am relaxed and comfortable and happy. I hope one day America gets to experience this quietness and peacefulness for itself one day.